Diss-a-rray?

It is true I haven't written a blog in a while, but who is to blame? me, or the cascade of time glutting, bloodsucking, ruthless tests that were bucket-poured over us in the past three weeks?

        Things still seem vague in regards of my collage situation, I have been fighting for every one last bit of hope I hold in my breath (fractions of marks, extracurricular activities, volunteering etc...), yet I'm not even sure what I want to be. Its not as simple as it sounds, I use to think people just choose what they aspire to be when they were younger, or what they excelled at. However, favoritism proved to be an unrealistic strategy.
Why? Because you don't always get what you want. For a matter with this amplitude, realism was the way to go, no following dreams or emotional inspirational melodramatic stories, just focus on whats real.
         As I came to assess the situation I had the following establishments left on the table: despite my fiery passion for biology I probably wont consider any field related to biology, I cannot study anything within the biology perimeter without including chemistry, and frankly speaking, I'm not ready to waste my time, money or effort on courses I know I will fail, so for that I blame the damn correlation.  I found myself bound to fields - I don't necessarily "feel for". An ultimatum, true...but in general a more acceptable one to me than others. I'm going to end up somewhere along the lines of Communications and Graphic Design probably and any confusion at this point is only natural, things never wind up the way you originally planned them to anyway. At the age of six I wanted to be a super hero, at the age of nine I wanted to be a lawyer, a scientist at eleven,  a biologist at thirteen, a wildlife biologist at fourteen, environmental science/ Graphic Design at fifteen through sixteen, and still lost amongst the eternal thoughts of endless seventeen, no one knows.
        I am confidant though that with time, things will take their course and hopefully only change towards the better, if god wants it to (I'm not being a creationist or anything, but its just this new thing I'm trying...I'll let you know if it works ;) ). I got my SAT scores  today, i did well in the math section..i think, so that's a step closer to an end....and end where we all begin :)